To say that once anything, always anything doesn't really leave much room for anybody to grow.
That doesn't necessarily mean it isn't a deal breaker for you. Only you can decide that.
My D's and I have had some intersting philisophical discussions on forgiveness that have helped each of us define (for ourselves) what that means.
In my case, I believe that forgiveness is for me (I had the hardest time forgiving myself for his leaving). By understanding that he is human and as such flawed and imperfect, I was able to forgive. Like all of us, he has limitations. Seeing not only his, but mine, make compassion so much easier for me.
I also believe that you can forgive someone and not choose to have any kind of R with them.
If all that's happened between the two of you is a deal breaker for you, it just is. You have limitations too.
Personally, until I'd worked through the anger, I wasn't in a place to forgive.
