Well in essence we are heading towards a separation now, or probably right after the holidays. The legal sort, not necessarily physical. In our state it requires four months from filing to divorce at a minimum, but with the courts it's usually six. Therefore I suspect the filing will come right after the new year.
As far as the budget, we already do that and have been since August. We budget out minimum payments on cards, payments for all the other stuff, discretionary spending for each of us, and then debt relief. We then apply the debt relief to specific accounts to close them out.
Childcare has been more ad-hoc but in essence we've done this each time her work schedule is issued, which is about every four weeks.
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
I should also mention that one of my motivations here is that I believe until we end up apart we'll never recon. I don't know that we will recon, but there is just something about my W right now. Other than getting through nursing school, I have never seen her so committed to making something happen.
All in all I hope I didn't do too much damage today. I ended up simply documenting some of the things we had already discussed in past D talks. I'm tired of her switching up what the last thing we talked about was, or "not remembering" what we had tentatively agreed upon.
I don't intend to bring them up. They are there and she can review them and comment or not. She can discuss them or not. Though the next time she wants to discuss them, if it's not an appropriate time I am going to stop her and ask her to set up a time with me to do it. I'm tired of her having these convos in the kitchen with our S running in every five minutes asking for attention and having to send him away b/c we don't want his ears in there. She can stay home after the kids go to bed just once and have an adult conversation about it if it means that much to her.
Married 6 together 8 Me:38 W:31 second marriage for both SS12, SD10, S6 Bomb: 9/8/11 (day before our 5 yr ann) W moved out: 2/18/12 D final: 11/12/12 Share S 50/50. Spend as much time as I can with SS & SD
