Hey sg! I was enjoying reading my old threads today as well. Hadn't gotten to this post though. thanks.
Most of those things are still true. Although I am no longer coaching, so that and the workouts would have to change.
I still work 2 jobs though, not just everyday. I teach kids everyday, but I also train teachers in how to teach math to meet the new standards- best practices so to speak.
I also have a lawn service, so no more mowing the lawn- no time with work and school.
I guess I'm even still looking for the same things from H. An emotional connection and support in the way that I need it. It's been 6 years and I'm still waiting- and from his end it's still all my fault. He still so wrapped up in his perception of everything, the cloud has never really lifted, and I guess I'm tired of having to deal with his emotional baggage- we've been married 21 years (including the 3 year sep)..... it's just too tiring.
Michele once told me that even if the guy loves me, he isn't going to do a complete overhaul, that there are things that we can improve and do differently, but that he wasn't going to become a different person and I should really look at what I expect or want.
Now, my man actually DID quite a reversal (after a 4m breakup), but I did some changes myself.
I think we all have a dark side or selfish side to us that just takes us over sometimes.
I get the tired part.
Do you like yoga? That might fit with your gymnastics background. Got money for a spa day?
I love the math thing...I'm a chemist by training, and I'm taking company sponsored Six Sigma, so I'm learning stats. And I get to use Minitab. It's fun. I still have a ways to go. I love that you're teaching folks new ways to teach math--everyone has a different learning style, and I think most people can learn most things, if they use their own style to learn it.
Hang in there--life is good. Very good.
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
great advice! And I think I have realized these past few years, that I both want and deserve more than H can give. The little stuff just doesn't cut it anymore.
I love yoga. I was going to Bikrim for a while and loved it, but the 90 minutes just got to be too much. Maybe if H moves out I can start back up. There's yoga at the Y near us, but with my kids schedules, I can never get there
You do deserve more! (I know you're not holding out, but sometimes, when you do it all for yourself, the spouse comes around)
I took most of my yoga at the Y, greatest instructor, but she has left. I've never taken Bikram, but a couple of my friends have, and G is interested, so I'm thinking about it. Might be too hot for me if I add in the hot flashes.
If you put a towel on the mat, does it slide off when you are changing poses? And are the poses more like vinyasa, or are they slower and steadier?
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
What do you really want for yourself? You're an exceptional, strong woman, who has a lot going for her. And I know you know how to get a life...because you have one.
What would make your life exceptionally happy?
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
Sox- There was an oldtimer--older than me... TomM or TOMM -- something like that. I think one of his best posts was used in DB, I don't think it is in DR. It was something like ... real happiness is found in living in accordance with your beliefs ... sort of being true to yourself.
You know for sure I believe in DB, and marriage and relationship...it all has to ring true deep down for those of us who like to live 'deep down'. Not sure I'm saying that right, but we need to be able to be true to who we really are. I think if we can 'really give' to ourselves, be real, we can 'really give to our spouses, kids, others around us.
Anyway, now I have to find the Bikram class. I'm going to look up the schedule now.
sg Love is PATIENT, love is KIND, LOVE never fails / DB since 2001
Sox- There was an oldtimer--older than me... TomM or TOMM -- something like that. I think one of his best posts was used in DB, I don't think it is in DR. It was something like ... real happiness is found in living in accordance with your beliefs ... sort of being true to yourself.
You know for sure I believe in DB, and marriage and relationship...it all has to ring true deep down for those of us who like to live 'deep down'. Not sure I'm saying that right, but we need to be able to be true to who we really are. I think if we can 'really give' to ourselves, be real, we can 'really give to our spouses, kids, others around us.
Ain't that the truth!! I keep going back to when I was here last.... when H had me switch counselors, and then he stopped going and never did joint therapy.
He has always had all these hoops to go through, and when I get though one, 3 more pop up.
My legs are getting sore from all this jumping, and now it seems the hoops are rings of fire.
Who I can talk to, how late I'm going to be at work, how I'm supposed to behave....
