Beginning now...

[irishblessings]

Again - so appreciative for your encouraging words and ideas on how to handle this rough time with my son.

These times are truly representative of the losses brought about by divorce. Obviously, I realize difficulties with teenagers occurs in all homes whether 2 parents or 1 - but having raised 2 kids already with 2 of us at home and now raising the last 1 by myself - it is a terrible, terrible shame. The inconceivable selfishness that is a permanent resident in my X has caused such a loss for my son. I know it will ultimately make him stronger but it is still not fair. And too often I feel so much guilt because (and I know this is MY problem) I stand before my son and daughters as the REASON my X is gone from the family. He didn't want ME any longer.

No 2x4s needed here because I know I am being irrational and hypersensitive - I just personalize it so much and I'm not at the point where days go by and I don't think about it. It is still too fresh. So many people still do not even know we are divorced and they send notes/emails/etc. with best wishes to X and me. We were not a couple others would have thought would be divorced. Just wasn't us.

But it is us - and it s*cks. Reality.

So today I hope to decorate for the holidays a bit. Going to take it easy and hopefully nap a bit before the work grind begins again tomorrow.

Happy Sunday to all!