Sandi2, here is an update since my post yesterday: W acknowledged my de-cluttering efforts from Thursday. I said, "Thanks, it has needed to be done for a long time" and then little more. Later, instead of lingering around on the same floor or trying to watch TV with her, I told her I was going to work in the basement. Surprisingly, she came down to the basement about five minutes later and asked me if anything was wrong. I told her no, that I had some projects that I needed to handle (further de-cluttering, etc.). She seemed (maybe I am reading too much into the situation) like she wanted to talk a little but the children kept coming into the room and interrupting and even though we sent them out several times, she eventually gave up and I did not pursue. Later, she seemed a little put off, cold, and distant (again, maybe I'm just reading into the situation). My conern is that she may be interpreting my giving her space and distancing as me not caring or me giving up on our M. (When I told her that I needed to take care of a few things today, she mentioned that she was not asking me what I was doing. The way she said it had a we-are-going-our-separate-ways vibe.) In my heart, I desperately want to let her know that I love her deeply and want our M to work but I say nothing because I do not want to turn her off or push her away. I also want to ask her to take one more chance on our M but I told her that pre-DB so she knows. Again, my concern is that she may be interpreting my giving her space, etc., as me not caring about our M and I do not want to convey that message. Any suggestions?
I'm working hard to GAL: increased exercise, working on long-neglected personal projects, de-cluttering, taking time away from the house, reading, and I feel great about these long-overdue efforts. At the same time, I am starting to feel the strain of living under the same roof and not being able to have any emotional or physical interaction with my wife. The sense of rejection is intense.
Two, final questions: (1) is there a productive way/way at all to get the DB information into my W's hands/head? I am not sure she is ready to read/digest it but, it speaks directly to our M. Second, is there any benefit/do you recommend me attempting to contact my W's C to schedule a meeting to share information with the C about me?
