Thought the roller coaster had bottomed out

[workinghardguy]

Ajay... I doubt she is heartless, I am sure she thinks of you. Maybe not in the way you wish she would, but I am sure she has thoughts of you. She is just too wrapped up in herself though.

I know you're in the UK so things are different than here in the States, but a couple suggestions.. first, what are some things you like to do? They don't even have to be "hobbies" just things you like to do. Identify those, write them down on a piece of paper or put them in a spreadsheet.

Next, use Google, friends, or whatever resource to find activities and groups that correspond to those things you like. Like mentoring youth? Find a local Boy Scout troop or youth group that needs volunteers. Like animals? Find an animal shelter. Like movies? Get a second job at a theater or maybe work with your local theater troupe or school to help them with their theater department.

A second option is to find enrichment activities that focus on things you like to do or things you want to do or learn.

These things will a) create interpersonal connections which will help fill these times with people and b) create stuff that needs to get done which also helps the time be occupied with worthwhile activity.

One of the reasons I am frequently on the computer? The volunteer work I do requires me to routinely update, check, and input data into our national database. Plus I have to write press releases, update our Facebook page, update our website, email my youth, and chat with the youth leadership. It certainly keeps me engaged and busy, and if I have downtime then there are usually 20 projects for that group that could be done at any given time.

When you get busy with this stuff you don't think of her as much. I know it's hard... nights like tonight, when she's at work and I'm home with my S I think of my W too. I know she takes the time to call and text friends but not me. I could lament it (which I do from time to time... it hurts and I'm human) or realize that she just doesn't know what she's missing and too bad for her.