Who designed this ultramarathon course?

[workinghardguy]

Sometimes I feell like she's giving me every reason in the book to want a D myself.

There's very likely some truth in this statement. She may not even be conscious of it, but right now she's all about herself and her needs. Frankly, you're probably lucky she gives your S as much thought as she does... and that's doesn't appear to be a great deal. If a M is about working together to help each other get their needs met and grow... well, she certainly isn't doing that, is she? So naturally you'd want someone who would do that with you.

If she shows you how bad a W she really is and her "true" self then maybe you'll do the heavy lifting of the D. And maybe you will... MWD says that sometimes a spouse truly is done with the M and it cannot be salvaged. She doesn't say that person can only be the WAS.

My W is in this nexus right now. She keeps telling me that I am seeing who she really is now. Out until 5 or 6am, partying like a rockstar at least every weekend and sometimes more often, binge drinking, etc... At the same time I know that's not really her. It's her right now for whatever reason. At some point she was the mom who would pass up a party night to spend it with her kids and play board games. So who is she really? I don't know. I'm willing to hang on for a while and see who wins out.