REQ: Looking for a thread from a fellow DBer...

[Abbey]

Walking, I know. Frankly the detaching is happening large bits at a time. I can't honestly say I want this man. I'm doing what I have to to survive until I get the hell out of here. All the sex is doing is hardening my heart.

I'm well aware of the abuse that he's doing. WELL aware of it. Make no mistake, if there was ANY way for me to get the f out of here, and not look back- I would. This abuse, his actions, all the things you have said above, are making it easier for me to never want to look back, or come back once this stupidity of his blows up in his face BIG TIME. And... it will.

I've set up what I need to survive once I walk out the door. Where as, I walk away right now, I walk away BROKE. Not going to happen. I'm stronger than that, and my methods are about buying time as much as survival.

FWIW, During the afternoon fight, one of the things I kept repeating was, you may as well repeatedly punch me in the face, because the emotional abuse you are doing is no different.

I have to take issue with not saying it's DBing however. Every last one of us on this board who've dealt with another woman has to put up with the same lying, cheating, deceptive bs, had to wait out the stupidity (because hey most of them die out after six months).

So, I'm aware he's made his choice, for now. He treats her like the spouse. He treats her as the priority. I saw his reaction to ME being over there. And needing to protect his whore.

Without saying a word, he's said loud and clear, I'm not good enough to meet his daughter. But the woman who falsely accused him of beating her up, walks on water and deserves his devotion.

Without knowing the full history behind this, again your assessment of my red hot anger, isn't misdirected. What we're talking about here in the OW...is a predator. A full on, narcissistic predator. She's using the child they created for everything she can.

My H wasn't this man for many years. Is the man he used to be still in there? Yeah, probably. I saw and painfully lived what happened once the shine went off the new penny the first time with her. I refused to see him, went dark. Then held him at bay for 3 months, only allowing him to call, not see me, until he got rid of her.

This time, ghe picture he's painting and the time I have to spend here until I can get out, ... I know where they lead. It's me who will finally just walk away. My own therapist says I'm already more than one foot out the door. The things he's doing now are making it easier to slam the door shut. For good.

Abbey