REQ: Looking for a thread from a fellow DBer...

[Abbey]

From the alien abduction files. I caught my H lying to me about going over the the OW's house. I got mad enough to go over there, pounded on the door.

She was shocked when she opened it and I was there. I told her: He's yours darling, you've won, you can have him. You two deserve each other. I happily called her a whore.

She swore up and down they're not sleeping together, has the same mantra as he does: I work too many hours to have a relationship etc. Explains that she can't tell her husband about H and her being in contact again and that H is part of his daughters life, because it will put him in an insane asylum. (Talk about grandiose opinion of herself, to think someone she has deceived over and over still is so in love with her that her actions could put him in an insane asylum. *shakes head*

Anyway, H goes wacko because now he's got 2 women who have him cornered in lies... (because I'm sure he's told her, we are no longer acting as a married couple)...SHE looks him straight in the face and says: You have to decide once and for all what you want.

He comes home... loaded for bear. I just kept saying, You lied to me. I caught you, you can rant and rave all you want. You're just mad because you got CAUGHT.

Then he tries to justify his lying as of course... MY fault. He had to lie because of my reaction to him spending time with her. (All the while he's trying to figure out how to approach him being able to go over in the night time to play "house" with their daughter and her 4 other kids.) (Which I want btw... nice dose of reality is exactly what needs to happen.)

He then tries to pull: well if you had of left this alone, it was pretty certain it would be you and I who are together in the end. So I point my finger into his chest and say bull... you are either lying or if that's how you feel, then this wouldn't break how you feel about me and a future for us. I walk over to the door she kicked and pointed to the scuff mark (that I've left there all this time)... and said that women lied about you beating her up... and YOU seem able to forgive her. So stop the BS.

He blathers about me now making her so mad that she won't let him see his daughter. I just said, oh really, hiring a lawyer would have you full alone access in weeks, so quit lying. He keeps saying, I can't believe the damage you've done. (yeah to unraveling his lies) So I start to repeat saying: Look,... you're in love with 2 women...so buy me out, and I'll be out of your life once and for all. Kept repeating it. Then he starts to cry. Telling me I deserve better. And starts clinging to me. Tells me he can't make promises about what will happen in the future. I told him the truth... I don't know what I want either.

I wait a while, she phones, he then tells her everything is ok here. Tells her something about me saying, fine go and have dinner with all the kids etc. (Yeah, like she doesn't have the happily ever fantasy of him living with her and her 5 kids.)

I wait a while and then approach him and ask: Have you approached our mortgage broker friend and could you buy me out.

He looks at me with shock and says you really want to be rid of me that badly? Cripes, talk about loss of reality.

Of course I start to cry by this point and say, I need to let you go, and you need to let me go. He tells me he loves me. I tell him I love him too but neither one of us are in love with one another. (How can you be in love with someone who's this far lost?)

He tells me no more sex. That's it, it's not fair. I smile and say, yeah... ok.

Half an hour later after a long convo and a lot of tears from both of us, I said, I still don't know why we can't have sex. He says: I'll think about it. I look him straight in the eye and pinch my fingers together leaving a space of about half an inch apart and say,... I'm leaving the door open that much. Both about the sex, and if I even want a future with you. He says no sex. I said,... yeah...sure. He then smiles and says. Because I haven't forgiven you yet.

When we sit down to watch the news,...I sit at the other end of the couch (instead of my position of sitting beside him). He reaches out to me and says come here. Why are you so far away? He pulls me close. Starts joking with me. And claims he's hunger. (even though 10 minutes before, he thinks he's mad and doesn't want to eat any food.)

Oh and to top it all off, he's so far out of brain, he swears we're no longer married that we got divorced in 2008. We didn't.

Oh btw,... he comes to bed... and starts caressing me. Whispers in my ear, I'm so mad at you. I don't know what kind of damage you've done. I reach out to kiss him... we have sex.

Alien abduction.