They pushed back the start of everything by two hours...which stinks because I could've went to bosses house. I missed out on some fun, but oh well.
Before I left I made a stop at the store. I text messaged the W and asked if they needed anything. I bought some board games and barbie dolls for my D's and I to play with. I grabbed what they needed and headed over there.
My PMA was up until I pulled into the parking lot. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. When it opened I was very cheerful and said hi to everyone and asked how they were doing. I gave my ladies their games and barbies. My youngest and I went and played with her new dollhouse. After a bit I played a board game with my oldest.
The atmosphere was...miserable. I tried to make the best of it. I didn't want to hole myself up in the girls' room so I went out in the living room and tried to get some people to play a board game with us. Everyone kind of ignored it, so I ended up playing with my oldest.
I don't know if it's because I was there or if it has always been this way and I am just realizing it because I've been gone awhile, but it seemed like a cloud of negativity was sitting over the room. I think it was a mix of both. I can understand why most of the people there would not want to talk to me. Who knows what the W has said about me. None of them know about the affair. There's a lot that they don't know about this thing. So, who can really blame them? Her mom has been trying to get the W to divorce me for years. She tried to sabotage the wedding. We had to take her out a couple days before and tell her that no matter what the wedding was going to happen. She was nice to me, but in a way that seemed to be rubbing the situation in my face. I never felt apart of her family, so it was par for the course....except amplified by 10.
I tried, I really really tried. I couldn't cut through the misery in that room. I tried communicating. When they would come over in the past I always holed myself up in my room and kept to myself. I tried to come out and play, but they didn't seem to want to. Maybe they were upset because I didn't eat as soon as I got there. I told them I had already eaten before I came and I would grab something later. I fully intended to. I feel bad, but they pushed everything back a couple hours and I was starving.
One of my D's friend and her mom came over. At that point, my D wasn't really up to playing with her old man...My youngest was exhausted and ready for bed. At this point I just figured it was time to go. I went for my kids...no one really felt like talking or doing anything...my W seemed indifferent to me being there. She was outside on her deck smoking and talking to her friend. I knocked on the window and motion that I was leaving and thank you.
