Birthday - Christmas

[workinghardguy]

This will sound odd maybe but I would simply ask her what she wants. Remember, part of this is loving our s in the way they want to be loved. Would gifts make them feel bad? Would it increase their guilt? Or would it be seen simply as a nice gesture.

I know it sounds unromantic, and it is, but us guys I think spend too much time worrying about how romantic what we are doing is or isn't. I mean really... our W's are walking out the door, somehow I don't think they care about the romance.

For Christmas I asked my W if she wanted gifts. She said no. Then later she backtracked a little, partially because no gifts under the tree for us would look odd to the kids who are still in the dark. So we agreed we would get gifts but not for each other. She picked something out and so did I.

What I did find interesting is that she picked out a Kindle Fire. Then she backtracked... she didn't want to spend that much. Ok.. well we budget for Christmas and put money away every week, so we have the money. I told her that if she wants it she should get it, it's not unreasonable (it's not an iPad after all) . Her response was that I then had to get something for myself of near equal cost. Traditionally she and I have splurged on the kids, I splurge on her, and then I don't get much. I've always been ok with that... Dads don't really need that much and seeing my W's smiles and kids' smiles was gift enough.

But if that is what she needs right now then I agreed to get something of equal value. So we'll be adding an XBox to the house (assuming I can snag one at Black Friday... already readying my quarterstaff for battle!). And of course what then suxx is that had to start a discussion about where the XBox would go after we split. Though we agreed I'd keep it and she could take the Wii. That way SS and I can play some Black Ops when he's over here. There's nothing like a little XBox for bonding with the pre-teen male