Keep up the good work. I don't have children so my situation is a bit different than yours. The advice you've been given about how to handle child situations seems like good advice though. Just remember, even tiny little things can be perceived as pressure to her. After a while, she may start to relax more when she realizes you aren't trying to get back together with her.
How's the sobriety going? Are you dealing with that through your IC or through another support group?
Great job on offering to take your son to the doctor. To me, that's a kind of 180. From your wife's response it seems maybe she resented it a bit that you didn't play a bigger role in DR visits. Keep that kind of stuff up.
Have you gotten the DR book yet? Take a look at the last resort technique and put it to work immediately. I think you said you were talking to a DB coach as well....he or she can help you deal with particular situations which are unique to you and aren't covered in the book. Stay strong! We're pulling for you!
