BKMom- I totally empathize with some of your sentiments. How long do we really want to wait in limbo and want to force being with someone that doesn't want to be with us?? It is extremely tiring and frustrating. I keep telling myself to be patient and give it time and that my w is in a process that I have no control over but it still [censored].
Keep your PMA and keep being the wonderful mother that you are.