I have just read your last 2 threads, and you have been given the best advise on Detatching for YOU that I have seen.
YOU have to do this for YOU, otherwise stuckville we be your residence for some time.
We all know its not easy, but do it. One of my favorite sayings is from Yoda LOL.....
No, try not, do or do not, there us not try.............
It will make xw mad, so what, you first.
Detachment is for you to heal, get away from the blame projecting and anger. Give YOU a chance to take a breath, GAL and figure out just who you are.
This also has a bye product at the same time (but is not the main driver). NC will show your strong and non clingy. It also shows strength, courage and non neediness. Be strong, get away from xw and give her time without the guilt she feels around you.
Take responsibilities for your contributions to the failure of the marriage, learn from them, but don't dwell on them. This is for you, to help you learn and to make you a better tad, for your future.
Yes its hard, bloody hard, we all know that, as I do......I'm doing it FOR ME, no one else.
It's been 5 weeks NC AT ALL from me, with 2 kids (12&14) so can be done. The hardest challenge for me was just last week when W left me a crying hysterical vm message, and I WAS tempted to call. BUT she was still projecting blame at me and throwing in she left me stuff, so why subject myself to mire of the same. Yes, I'm human and did FEEL it, but I didn't react, respond or reply, for ME.
You can do it too
Me - 37 W - 38 D - 14 S - 12 Together - 16 Married - 12 Bomb - April 13, 2011 W moved out - May 13, 2011
The man I became is changing back to the man I was........... and more
