I have been interested in this particular aspect of infidelity as it deals with my sitch all too well. Bond, I am intrigued that you say that you've seen the "friends" approach work many times. It seems that your advice toward LBS' in the Newcomers section points more towards creating distance and boundaries until the A "burns out." I'm very interested in hearing more about your theories. I'm dealing with my W's A now, and I'm hoping that I'm not bungling things up.
Abbey, this is my take: I guess the best plan is to observe and monitor results. If you're getting positive results -- which it most certainly seems that you are! -- then keep doing what you're doing. Couldn't hurt! However, if the WAS shows little respect for the LBS and seems to be using them in a case of cake-eating, then perhaps a tougher stance seems more appropriate.
