Learning from the pain....hard lessons

[In_Shock]

thanks rick. I know it's hard for you to even think about all this after 25 years together. Thanks for your kind words and prayers. I, too like who I am becoming. Not sure what/who W will end up being, but.... I'm trying to let go and 'drop the rope' as they say.

We did our weekly eating dinner out thing tonight. She brought up R talk -- said she is done. Reiterated that it's over. I validated. I agreed. IOW, I did something totally different. I didn't argue. I didn't beg, plead, cry or any of the above. I channeled some sort of inner peace that I kept saying to myself --- i will be ok. I do NOT need W--- I will make it for me and S. End result -- I was able to act like a 'rational person' as W told me again that she doesn't even like me -- that she doesn't want to talk to me about anything except S and practical matters (probably a good idea). I validated. I agreed.

I left afterwards and had a nice cry in my car alone. I'm home. She will be here soon. I'm drying my eyes and preparing to keep up my appearance of strength and acceptance. You guys are the only ones (except for a couple of select friends) that will know the truth. I want my family. Perhaps the only way to save this at this point really is just to drop the rope.

It will be easier when W has moved out, but I'm going to do the best I can for now. As 25 *hey 25 where ARE YOU?? * says, if you get dealt bad cards, play them well.