W collected the kids on the usual day (I still do not see her, as I requested she not come in the house), then the next day, on the same day I received the Christmas tree solicitor’s letter I picked up a voicemail message from W at 08:00 which she had left at 7:45
W was hysterical and crying, and could hardly speak, and went like this….
GAL Man, it’s W
Please tell me what you have been telling the kids
They just don’t want to be with me any more
I can’t take this anymore
There against me, completely 100%
I left u not the kids
I can’t do this
I was/am very concerned for W, but I cannot fix this, W has to. TBH I have complete empathy for W, but no sympathy for her, this is consequences of her actions, especially with the kids.
If W hadn’t again blamed me for her relationship with the kids, and threw in again that she left me not the kids I would have called her, but what was the point, I would have only got more blame projecting.
I did draft up a text to send her, but again, chose not to send it in the end.
Later the same day both kids called me, and both said that W had been arguing with them the night before (the night she picked them up) and added the following (I will bullet point them)
- W had very little food in her flat for them
- They cleared 20-30 empty wine bottles from her kitchen the last time they were there
- W is moody and angry with them all the time
- They got into an argument again the morning of W;s vm message
- W has now told them I treated her badly for 15 years!!!!!!!! (Was waiting for that one!)
- W told the kids that I said to her I was taking the kids from her and going for full custody (I have actually said the opposite of this MANY time via different methods!!!!)
- They have told W they are happy with the present arrangements of saying with me 10 days out of 14 and want it to continue
- S12 said he wants to go round there less!
- S12 said when is this all going to be over, the Div, (W has told them it will be over soon, and please can they stay with her more)
- D14 says that I state it their choice where they stay, and I am happy with whatever they decide, where as W pays guilt on them, saying she is lonely, has no one to talk to, its not fair, consider how she feels. D14 said it still all about her!
- W was shouting and crying
TBH, this is really hard for me, as I need to review this over the next few weeks, as I feel it is really (W) starting to get to the kids now. I have also told my solicitor this.
I am concerned that I have detached from W and dropped the rope (have not communicated to her for nearly 5 weeks now, and not replied to her message or call), but W’s anger, blame and projecting are now going elsewhere, i.e my children.
Me - 37 W - 38 D - 14 S - 12 Together - 16 Married - 12 Bomb - April 13, 2011 W moved out - May 13, 2011
The man I became is changing back to the man I was........... and more
