Hi SFO, I have a good feeling too! We'll see. I don't limit myself to Asian women. I've had girlfriends in the past of all races. I do find Asian women very attractive though. I'm also good with them! I understand the culture from living within it for 17 years and that's a good selling point. My last email to Wendy I emphasized that and she responded. You gotta use whatever advantage you've got out there! I also live in a community with a large Asian population, so often whether through work or activities that's who I come across. So that's my story and I'm stickin' to it! Lol
We're up to 45 now...I think, I'm actually losing count. I don't respond anymore. I used to because I thought it polite but I've been re-thinking that. When you see a response in your box you expect a positive and to open it and find a rejection...well, it may be better to send nothing. Also, when you reply some women just keep on emailing you or try to chat with you because you responded. I got one negative response from one email and the next day a thank you for sending the same thing, so who really knows. I think I'll stick to no response for now.
Hey Dbers, I'm wondering whether it would be Ok to drop Wendy a short email Friday to say "see you tomorrow!" just to kind of re-confirm our coffee date. I've heard from others that no shows are not uncommon in the online dating world. So it's a way of me letting her know that I'm really intending to be there. In the past, I've had a habit of overdoing thoughtfulness, and I don't want to do that here, but it might be a nice gesture and I don't imagine too many other guys take the time to do it. Would it be a nice thing to do, too much or just not necessary? OMG, it's like being a teenager again! Lol.
Personally, I think it could come off as needy. You've got the time and place and now your job is to show up. No guarantees on her end but hopefully she will too. Relax, you are just meeting her.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Ok, I beg to differ on this one, kat. I can't stand when people don't show and being a bit uneasy about the whole meeting in a coffee shop thing - I would be pleased if someone confirmed. But keep it absolutely the simplest. Friday app 3 PM - "See you tommorrow". That's it.
Yes, Wii - you have to be careful not to kill her with kindness. People are funny and they do scare off easily. It's good to be a conversationalist but also be a good listener and let her do at least 50% of the talking. Make sure you echo back some of what she is saying so she knows you really are listening.
You will learn A LOT about online dating from this first encounter. And you will also learn A LOT about yourself.
Thanks Kat and SFO, I do plan to listen and ask questions. I'm not gonna rant on about the wonders of me! I'll have to be careful not to use social work jargon that we use on clients, she'll know that stuff! Lol. As far as the email, "see you tomorrow" was all I planned to write. Just to say "hey, I haven't forgotten". It's funny because I am nervous, this is the first time I've ever done this. Usually, you meet someone, get a feel for them and then ask them for coffee or whatever. This is strange! I've never been on a blind date either in my life. But, I know I'll do fine. I'm a good conversationalist, know how to ask questions and have my sense of humour to lighten things up and can always fall back on my dazzling good looks! I'll be fine. My best friend just started spending time with a lady he met online and he was talking to me last week about how anxious he is about it! So it's nice to know it's not just me
Are you kidding? I was Terrified the first time I went on a coffee date. And the second time too. Never dated much having married my high school sweetheart - it was way out of my comfort zone. But she will likely be nervous too. Every single person I met online was somewhat nervous in the beginning. It's is trying to find something to talk about that works. One guy I met in a coffee place called "Common Grounds" - that's really what it's about. You'll be fine!
On my first date with Josh (we actually started with a dinner date) - I just reminded myself that the worst that could happen would be that we wouldn't hit it off and there wouldn't be a second date. Obviously - that's not what happened.
Hey, thanks for reminding me tht she'll be nervous too! It's good to keep that in mind. Who knows how long she's been out of action, for me it's been over 21 years. MM was a different experience entirely but I was anxious when I first starting initiating with her. I was down visiting my brother a few nights ago and he lives about 10 minutes from where I'm meeting Wendy so I decided afterwards to check out the area, where the parking is, where the Timmy's is. I hate going blind into some place I've never been and don't know where anything is. I have no contact number so if something came up I have no way to let her know. So, I checked out the area before heading home. She was right, tons of parking right beside the Timmy's. Anyway, what will be will be. It will be another first for me no matter where it goes! I told my buddy to drop by and introduce himself to her as my ex-gay lover just to add a little spice to the first meeting. Hey, maybe I'll take her down to the Occupy Toronto march in the afternoon, what a perfect first date that would be, we could get tear gassed together Lol.
Well, this afternoon I emailed Wendy (at 3:00pm as per Barb's directions lol). I just wrote "see you tomorrow! Whatis." She emailed me back this evening "for sure! Wendy" So wish me luck folks as tomorrow I go where no man has ever gone before...OK, maybe not but wish me luck anyway!
