Thank you so much Angel... It's so strange because I think he has been in two at the same time. He seems to be in acceptance at times too.
Jack, I think you are right, it is wishful thinking on my part that it's over. I've been hesitant to believe my h when he says, "I feel better now. I feel more clear".
My H came to me last night, and he said in the spirit of being honest about everything, he wanted to let me know that he had been looking at pornography again. He said it was a stress release, and that since he and I have been intimate again, he's wanting to phase porn out of his life. He just wanted to tell me though... because he felt guilty keeping it a secret.
I didn't react well to this, because I have strong feelings about pornography. He was upset to see that he had hurt me again... and I pushed him away from me last night and couldn't talk to him. It's a new day however, and now I need to think of how to handle this. I appreciate his honesty and I'm so glad he was honest, but I feel I'm getting waylaid again.
If anything, this pulled me back from the fantasy of thinking his troubles are over with. Kind of snapped me into reality, which is what I needed. Things are going pretty good with h and I, but at the same time I still believe troubles are brewing beneath the surface and that he will be dealing with things for a long time to come.
I'm not really angry with h about this, just disappointed.
