A few questions-Can someone explain to me how they the WAS detaches so well? Like we don't exist? Even their children??
Also, what about Thanksgiving? Do we invite him? I suppose this is major pursuing? Should my view be-this is what you wanted so here you go- you are without us-?!?
I don't think I have any 180's? IDeas?
180's - DETACH - Stop your pursuit. The most important change that you can make. LET GO. Live your life "as if" he is never coming back. Remember that any changes you make are for YOU not to get him back.
Thanksgiving - In general you should let the MLC'er control the contact. I would not invite him unless he asks. Sounds like that might be another 180 for you.
As far as why they detach so well - I think it is because during MLC they are the OPPOSITE of who you have know during their their adult life. Scientifically this can be traced to hormones becoming the OPPOSITE at midlife as they were earlier. It some respects it has nothing to do with you or the children, you are just a casual bystander and collateral damage to the storm.
