Never thought I would be the one to file

[imthemom]

good morning..
I also was the one to file papers, even though i do not want a divorce...and for the same reasons. financially the kids and I have been struggling.
I will tell you that I knew it was going to be one of the hardest things ive done, but was not prepared for how I reacted. When the L put them down in front of me and I saw the date of marriage and date of seperation, and then had to sign...
I burst into tears, and i mean complete sobbing mess. I felt like a complete idiot but the L was pretty understanding, she knows the situation. I was not prepared for that at all, so try to prepare yourself and maybe have some place to go right after...do not be alone. maybe meet some friends to keep your mind from dwelling on it. They are just papers....my hope is that this works out and I never have to follow threw with it, but I also know that there is a huge chance that that will not happen and I am in the process of prepareing myself for that...not there yet but at least I can look at that possibility without getting hysterical at this point.
ill be thinking of you