After reading your posts, all I got was that you're keeping score for the things you and her do. First off, this isn't a competition. If you want to do the dishes, housework, etc. then do it. If you don't, then don't. But don't do it just because you expect something back or that it should be fair.
In terms of your actions to change things. I really haven't seen anything that would make her attracted to you. I mean, so you stopped sexual advances. While that's fine for guys, women don't work that way.
Have you tried showing your W affection? I don't mean grabbing her @$$, but complimenting her and hugging her out of the blue? You aren't going to get immediate results, but give it time. You never know. You have to feed her emotions for her to give physically.
Next, I'd get rid of the old resentment you have about your XW. You seem to compare the two quite a bit and how you feel victimized by both. They aren't co-conspirators. Don't let your W pay for the sins of your XW. That's over with.
Think about it this way. When you meet a girl that you like for the first time, what do you? Grab her? Slip your tongue down her mouth? Of course not. You figure her out first. You engage.
Try that out. It's better than being pissed off all the time.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
