Hi, itm, I don't know how popular this direct approach is with others, but if your counselor has been saying for you to do it, then go for it. It just isn't fair that in counseling that your H gets to sit there and blame you for everything under the sun, and you are not allowed to defend yourself, when the counselor's office is the place you should be allowed to do so. Otherwise your time there is being wasted. My H also stated that my anger caused him to drink. He would take a bottle of vodka into the downstairs den and drink himself into a stupor. I got sick and tired of hearing it, too. I like how you ended the letter; the last two sentences. vc
