Yes, Wii - try to rein in your tendency to be over-enthusiastic. First of all - this is not a date, it's a meeting. Think of it as a pre-date - a substitute for, say, running into someone at a party or the grocery store. This is just an opportunity to meet a new person, someone you may or may NOT have any chemistry with. Don't come on too strong, or you may scare off even the good candidates.
I remember the second guy I met from online. I'd made the mistake of carrying on too much of an online conversation with him before we met. When we met, he behaved as if he was falling in love with me - meanwhile, I didn't even really know him! It turned me off - scared me off, actually. It made him appear desperate. A woman wants to feel like a guy gets to know HER, then falls for HER - if it seems to be happening too fast, then it feels like he's just falling for some fantasy.
So keep it easy, don't try too hard. Consider you will have many such casual meetings before you meet someone where the chemistry is mutual. Relax.
Hey, don't worry about me coming on too strong...I don't know the lady and I'll be too busy crapping my drawers! MM was a far different situation. I knew her, we had a history to draw on, we'd talked a lot before I asked her out. I remember wondering what the heck we'd talk about if we ever went out! It was different...and remember she was initiating too by calling me, texting me, fbing me pretty regularly. Again, this is a first meeting, an opportunity to check each other out and, if nothing more, have a nice conversation and a decaf for me! Hey, what do you wear for a 9:00am coffee "date"...I'm thinking of going in my PJ's.
That's what I was thinking, thanks! Now what should I tell her to wear lol. My next question is do I bring her photos of my package or just email them to her? Isn't that what you do in online dating? I don't want her to think I'm weird if I don't!How about a nice framed hand drawn sketch of the package components instead, that would make our first meeting truly memorable and highlite my love of the arts lol. Oh so much to think about!
I really like the smell of cologne. On myself. On my man. But so many people are allergic to it that it has become unacceptable. And I have found that many people "overuse" it. To the point it is nauseating. In fact - a couple of people mentioned my Ex's overuse when he was cheating. They figured he was using it to cover the smell of alcohol. UGH!
So - simply - no cologne.
It is always a good idea to think of some interesting topics and have them at the ready if you get a lull. I'm doubting you will have a lull, though. Like me - you have the gift of gab.
Conversation topics, let's see...we're both social workers so that should take up pretty much all our discussion time lol. From the way she writes she was not born here, Hong Kong I'm guessing. I've been there numerous times. So we have that we can talk about. When she came here, where she went to school...blah blah blah Then there's our kids, we both have them. Then there's "what do you do for fun" hobbies, sports etc. She likes ping pong, skating, cooking, traveling and movies. Hey, and as an added bonus, being a Chinese social worker maybe she's worked for my STBX...wouldn't that be a fun conversation to have lol. So, I think I'm OK on the conversation part. Wow, so much to think about for one little coffee date! But, bottom line is you gotta do the work if you want the payoff. I wonder if she puts out on the first coffee date? I'll ask if there's ever a lull in the conversation. It's always good to have something to fall back on
There are also the topics to avoid. And number one would be "THE EX" or the divorce or MM. Absolutely no way do you mention any one of the above or it will be one very short meeting.
There are also the topics to avoid. And number one would be "THE EX" or the divorce or MM. Absolutely no way do you mention any one of the above or it will be one very short meeting.
Barb
Hey any topic that stops me from getting into her pants within the first hour, is out! lol. Btw, I had this horrible thought, she's a Chinese social worker and she lives not far from Voldy's workplace...what if she works for Voldy...wow, that would be a conversation topic to avoid!!! So "Wendy" emailed me tonight and suggested a time and place to meet and asked if that was OK by me. So it's Timmy time on Saturday! Will I roll up the rim to win? We'll see. I told her I was looking forward to it and left her my cell number and my name. She replied "Then it's confirmed!" and signed her name. So I emailed back "Goodnight Wendy" and she returned the email "goodnight Whatis!" Hmm, vaguely familiar somehow lol. It's gonna be fun! Btw, I'm up to 42 women now...life is good!
My impression so far is GOOD. I found that so many people online were vague about their first meeting. I believe in making firm commitments and confirming them but so many people left me wondering if they were really going to show or not.
I have a good feeling about "Wendy" and who cares who she works for. It's great that she has a job.
Question - Do you limit yourself to Asian women? Just wondering. I know you are not Asian but Voldy and MM were. And last week's prospect as well. Most you've mentioned are also in your lne of work. Remember to keep all your options open.
