Do you recommend that I verbalize to my WW what you all have said here?
That is, I understand now that you felt emotionally abandoned, that you tried to help me, etc, etc.
if you truly understand what we are saying and if you truly "Get it" and mean it, then I don't see how it could hurt.
But you have to be clear and brief but show that you GET IT...so no talk of HER choices except how she tried to reach out to you and no discussion about HER failures..
it's all about what you did or didn't do. You went into self pity and dealt with your grief in a way that did not help her at all. You were MIA and she really needed you, etc.
I'm not trying to make you feel worse, but want you to know how to say it without spending an hour rehashing....just make the point that you get it now, in a way you didn't before.
And if you had it all to do over again, you'd do LOTS of things differently...and you know you both miss your d....you wish you both had better tools for grief THEN, but hey, we're all human and doing our best and then, with NO expecatations, thank her in some way for hearing you (maybe a small hug??) to somehow convey that you just want HER to know that YOU KNOW that you didn't show up for her and you sure wish you had.... and end the talk.
Don't expect her to slap her forehead and wake up and now want you back.
Best case scenario is you will have planted a seed that takes weeks or months to grow.
make sense?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
