IS - you asked so I'm answering. Let's get this settled.
"she seems to be doing so many things to hurt me on purpose lately."
Mindreading. It could be just because you're hyper-sensitive to EVERYTHING she does right now. So if she turns away from you, you take it as rejection. The thing with focusing so much on your sitch is that you will tend to overanalyze things. It's natural. Ease up a bit on that.
"I have gotten better at listening....but I am guilty of not always UNDERSTANDING what she wants/needs/means."
This is a two way street. SHE also has to be able to listen and understand that you may not be understanding her. I'm sure there are times she doesn't understand the meaning of what you're saying either.
Try this. The next time you discuss something that's more than just "how's the weather." Say this..."Okay, just so I understand what you're trying to say, you're saying this..." Repeat what she says and ask questions. When you ask questions it shows you're engaged and genuinely interested in what she's saying. This will help with the misinterpretation of things.
All couples over time assume that their partner will automatically know what their thinking. No way. It's the first pitfall of marriage. You're not a mind reader and neither is she.
If she gets upset, then tell her that you are trying to understand her so that there is no miscommunication. If she says that you should "know" she means this or that, flip it around. Ask her if she "knows" what YOU mean every time. Sometimes by putting them into your shoes will help them to understand that they don't walk on water.
"telling her I want to work it out someday."
Yeah stop that now. Don't talk about the future. Go things one day at a time.
How engaged is she with your son?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
