W told me she is done & doesn't love me anymore.

[MrBond]

"I apologized for what I honestly feel are my flaws."

First off, what you think are "flaws" that pushed your relationship over the edge may not be the same "flaws" your wife sees.

Second, even if they were, you don't point them out. You're trying to get your W to stop concentrating on them remember?

Third, She wasn't perfect either. However, by pointing out your "flaws" you've made her think - "yeah why was I with you for so long? I could do so much better because there's nothing wrong with me."

You can try to justify it as much as you want, but that's how it goes. I saw it in my sitch and tons of others.

"Sorry for breaking the rules but saying nothing has not worked either. "

There are no "rules" you do what works. The problem is that people don't often have the patience to wait for their actions to take root. How long were you actually in no contact with her? 1 day? 1 week? In the book it says to wait two weeks before changing strategies. Have you done that?

In any event, you really shouldn't send out messages like that IMHO.