If you can't get past the fact that your W won't make the first move, then you should. And once you have taken that first step, it becomes easier to take the second step. And once you take the second step, perhaps it becomes easier for your W to take her first step. See how that works?
I suppose that's true. MWD covered a big section in DR about both people in the M not taking the first step because neither one thinks that they should have to be the one to do it. I'll have to revisit that part of the book.
Originally Posted By: 2thepoint
I'm not trying to be judgmental here, but the porn addiction really needs to be addressed. You have said that when you stop, things seem to improve. But, you stopped before then picked up the habit again. So who's to say that that won't happen again. And, isn't it possible that your W sees this as a major problem and doesn't trust that it wont resurface again, and again, and again? And since the lack of passion is a major problem as your W sees it, don't you see how the porn addiction gets in the way? See, this is something that I think you really should focus on.
Have you considered counseling? Seriously, you may have more of an addiction than you realize and counseling will help you understand why this addiction plays such a role in your life and can help you manage it.
I would love to go to counseling, but unfortunately, I just can't afford it right now. However, I think that I'm definitely on the track to recovery. Like I said before, I didn't use to think that there was any problem with watching porn, but now that I know that it can cause major problems, especially when it comes to sex and relationships, I have sworn off of it. I do not picture myself back-tracking on this issue. But thanks for the suggestion, I appreciate it.
