Peter, I'm sorry it's come to this but I can't say I'm surprised. As you know, I had a feeling your W was having an A in the summer based on her behaviour and of course my own situation.
Peter, don't fight her on any of this and stop saying you want the M. She knows. Stay strong, validate and detach. It's the best chance you have of saving your M.
My H and I have reconciled and I have no doubt that would have never happened if I hadn't followed the advice I received and read in other sitches here on the board. It's hard when you're afraid and everything you value is falling apart around you but it does work. And if it doesn't and you get a D, you will always be grateful that you did everything you could to save your M and you can tell that to your children someday when they ask.
Hang in there, Peter. You can do this. Give her a D is she wants it. Don't fight her but protect yourself. Let the reality of it all come crashing down around her and only then will she be in the place to re-think her decisions.
