W told me she is done & doesn't love me anymore.

[Snowman]

Ok, here is a rough draft of my message to my W. Please edit it or let me know what I should change or leave out:

I wanted to email you to express my thoughts and feelings. I have thought about our last interaction and the things that have been shared in the past. It seems to me that you feel pressure from the church and others to do what they think is right. If you want to drink and have other issues with the church that I’m unaware I would like to understand it. I can understand the pressure from the church as I have felt it too and I can understand the choice to drink as I also tried it. I don’t hold it against you and want to support you in things that you would like to do. I have learned through this that you have felt like you have done things that everyone else wants you to do. I want to support you in your goals and things you want to do as long as you would like the same for me.

I want to support you in school so you can reach this goal as I know it is important to you. I know I didn’t show my support in the right way but that truly is because I know you are such a good mother to our son and I wanted you to be there for him. It was never a selfish thing because I didn’t want you to be successful or thought my job/career was more important than you. I have learned what is most important to me and that is my family and Ian having that most time with his parents as possible. I regret how things have been I the past but all I can do is live in the present and let you know that I’m willing to support our family in the decisions that we make.

I’m so grateful for the beautiful son that we have brought into the world and the opportunity as a father I have had to raise him. I’m grateful for the great mother that you are and the great care that you have shown our son. I know how much you love kids and they are drawn to you because you are so good with them. I’m thankful for this and know I have learned a lot from your children skills.

I know I have not shown the interest or care for various things in our lives but especially in social interactions but that truly is not who I am. I truly love to meet new people and learn new things just like the next person. I know I have seemed closed in the aspect but I truly have not meet your new friends that seem to be your coworkers just as you don’t really know my coworkers. As for your family I know I have not open my heart to them like I should have but I truly do love them and want to continue growing my relationship with them. My family feels that they have not got to know the real you either and wants to get to know the real you. Everyone does love you and wants to the best for you and our family not from a church perspective but for us as a family.

I don’t want to focus on all the negative things of the past rather on the entire positive that we have had. I know we have things to work on and I have seen in my own self reflection the things I need to change and want to change but I want to do this together. I apologize for my negative reactions through this and want you to know that you are so important to me. I do care about how you feel and understand the lack of support that you have felt. I’m here for you and support you through this.