I'm so sorry you've experienced so much pain. I'm sure there is no way that we could know everything you've gone through. Have you ever tried to write about your experiences?

I wanted to let you know that you're not being ignored but I, for one, am not qualified to give the advice you are needing. It would seem, to me, that your situation is more complicated than most, and therefore, would need a professional to guide you. I certainly don't speak for anyone but myself.

The DB board is full of folks who will give their support. Many people read what you have to say without making a single comment.....but you are heard!

Newcomers are monitored for a few days, so don't give up if your posts are slow to show up.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!