I need advice for dealing with a WAW

[sandi2]

I completely agree with the C about the guy friend being gone for good! Those type of situations are never good for a young couple (or old couple either, realy). I read from another author how couples need to "affair proof" their M's. Even though there is always somebody of the opposite sex out there, as a M couple....you have to do what you can to protect your MR from an A. And, I am strongly against having anyone living under the same roof with a young M couple......and especially relatives. It invites trouble.

but how is my wife to know about these improvements when she doesn't even want to talk to me?

The other people (like her foster parents) will be saying positive things about you. Don't ask them to tell her you've changed, just let the self-improvement speak for itself.

You're going to get tired of hearing us remind you that she's got to have time, but that's what it takes.....and especially with her problems toward men. I think she may have been "expecting" the M to fail, and when you threatened D.....she thought, "that figues, it's just like a man". Her respect, or lack of it, for men is pretty low on the list. It's going to be extremely important for her to respect you as a man, first, and her H, second.
Since both of you are Christians, then I'm sure she's been taught by her Pastor how God designed the roles of the man & woman in the MR. Have you ever noticed that the scripture tells the man to "love" his W, but it tells the W to "respect" her H. The King James Version uses the word "submit" but it means to show respect. That's the only way a man can truly be the leader & protector over his family. Without the W's respect, he cannot succeed in leadership with his children or the M. You have a serious responsibility.

Guess I get carried away. So, you get two sermons today.

I believe in the power of prayer. Don't give up.

BTW, you are getting advice from several sources. As long as it seems to "agree" with each other, then I think it's okay. But if you begin getting confused by different advice...then you will need to narrow that down. You'll even find different opinions here on the board. If you get confused by some of it, then tell us and we'll see if we can help straighten it out.

((hugs))