Looking for HOPE

[PERSEVERANCE]

I'm in the Guard/Reserves-currently deployed to Afghanistan. My wife of 17 years, whom I love & adore, has just announced that she wants a divorce. Our marriage was beautiful until the last few years. I supported her through post-grad school & business ventures. Finance issues & frequent seperations have caused a strain...She discovered in individual counceling that she has been running from our marrital problems by traveling often for work- I said things that I regret...thinking about it, I probably suffer from depression/anxiety issues.I have an appt scheduled for my return to the states to deal with my own insecurities. She felt unappreciated and I'm sure that I hurt her self-esteem. Unfortunaely-I took out my own frustrations on the ones that I love. I regret all of it.
I'll be home soon. I suggested couples counceling when I return, but she said that its too late (she had suggested it for 2 yrs- but I was in denial, and refused to go). I believe her when she tells me that there isn't another man. She said that she loves me- but can't return to the way we were. She admitted that she has been crying alot. I just started to learn the 180 rules...it is so hard. I love and adore my wife and children. I want to save our family. I need help- Is it possible to save my marriage? I hope that I'm not too late. I'll do anything to save my family-- Looking for HOPE & advice please! Thanks so much for this site..Soory if I'm rambling- my head is spinning