Like I commented on MZ's thread, you are doing an excellent job at working to discover how you can improve YOU, which will ultimately lead to a happier marriage. I think in today's society, where so many women do work in positions with salaries that either match or top their spouse's, it's easy for men to slip out of the leadership role and let the wife take over. Even in my situation as a stay-at-home-mother, I'm the one who has pretty much run the show (paying the bills, deciding how money is spent, etc).
No question in my mind that your childhood has an impact on how you deal with conflict as an adult. I'm very sorry to hear that you were bullied and that an adult didn't step in to help you learn how to remedy your problems in a more effective way. Why not imagine yourself as that child again and how you as an adult would suggest for him (you) to handle the conflicts he (you) faced? Then, apply those same principles to your adult life.
Best wishes to you...you are on the right track by improving yourself in positive, healthy ways. It's encouraging to me as I begin the piecing process.
