How 2 balance detaching & improving communication?

[2thepoint]

...she briefly brought us up and asked how I was which she hasn't done in a long time. I said I'm doing really good. She said she notices that I seem much happier and feels I've adjusted well to our seperation. She commented how we are both in a much better/happier place than we have been recently. We continue to communicate much better which I'm appreciative of.

I think what your W is doing is reacting to your detachment and is trying to reel you back in. She is testing you and you need to be careful here. Provide short but polite responses to her questions and try not to linger too long. Continue your detachment efforts and create that mystery that appears to have piqued your W's interest.

In all honesty though, my own reaction to what your W said about how much happier you both are and that you both appear to be in a better place would have me a little panicked. I would be thinking; Now don't go getting too comfortable in your "better place" because I want you here with me!

Assuming you are having similar thoughts, how do you push that feeling aside so that you don't derail your DB efforts?

Is this a good sign that she has noticed and perhaps accepted some of my changes (which I have made for myself not her or is this a sign that she may feel we are better and happier off as seperated and just friends??

See that is the part that would have me worried. I would think the same thing...she is getting comfortable which is contrary to what I want. I want my W back, not hanging out in a "better place."

I think DB'ng would mean to continue to work on your changes and do those things that make you attractive, not just friendly.

I do share those same concerns of yours so perhaps we could get some insight from a few of the veterans on the board.