What do I do next? Part 2

[luvhurts49]

I wish I had your outlook Accuray. I keep going back and forth on doing more and doing less with myself. Some days, when not with the kids, I try to get out either to my mom's or my friend's house, other days I just sit in front of the TV and mope. I know I should be doing more, but I'm just so emotionally drained.

GAL is hard for me because I don't have many friends and even less that actually do anything. I also don't make friends easily (cross between being shy and an a$$hole). Let's just say that my attitude can be abrasive at times.

I'm hoping that I will get out of this funk soon (3 months and counting) and actually feel like doing something. Depression is playing a huge role in my day to day life--some days I deal with it better than other days. Of course, when I have my kids it helps a great deal.

I would love to have my kids around more often than just 50/50, but that would also mean that my W would have more time for OM since she doesn't see him when she has our kids. So on one hand I want more time with my kids and on the other hand, I also want her to spend less time with OM.