Rick1963: Unfortunately that describes a lot of men who are basically good men, but became lost in their need to be accepted and loved. The "sensitive man" model evolved from a lot of misguided ideas, and while it was supposed to be more attractive to others - especially women - it had the opposite effect. westcoastfella: Indeed, where have all the "men" gone? My father was a part of "The Greatest Generation"; those men and women who were born in the 20's and 30's, served their country with honor in WWII and Korea and understood the meaning of loyalty, integrity and honor. He was a strong, hard working, hard playing and hard drinking sonofabitch (his own words) who lived life to its fullest and was a man's man. I like to think that the new generation, like my son and Gunny's son, will start to echo some of those traits.
25: You are good for my soul, my dear. I am far from perfection, though...just ask my wife (insert rim-shot here). Yes, what I wrote is true, I'm in the best shape I've ever been in and a sense of humor is mandatory for surviving life. My point was not to puff myself up, but to air out my bewilderment about my W's poor choices. But I suppose that I will never really know what drove her to this, other than her claims of constant unhappiness. I do look forward to the day when I can have someone in my life again; someone who is mentally and emotionally healthy and has the confidence in herself to just be herself without pretense. gb90: I see what you were saying; thanks for clearing that up. Yes, we were two broken people trying to fix each other, and that never works. My W has admitted she could never reveal her true self to anyone because she has such a feeling of self-criticism. When we had our first R talk after she dropped the bomb she again told me this, insisted she never felt any intimacy with me but felt like she found "true intimacy" with the OM. When I heard this I was devastated, and that stayed with me for a long time. Now I see that it was not my responsibility to "make her happy"; she has to do that on her own. But she can't; and she will continue to expect others to do that for her.
H 56 W 48 D27,S21 SS25 SS22 Severely autistic M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs. "I've never loved you" 3/7/2011 Separated 8/7/2011 BITS
