Sandi, the main reason I came to this board is because I keep doing the wrong things, trying to talk to her about the r, which keeps pushing her away. I just did it again yesterday. I had made it over a week without doing this too. The kids are currently with me, but as soon as she moves in her new apartment, the d will move in with her, I am not sure about my s yet. I am hoping he stays with me. I don't have a problem with him spending a lot of time there if he decides to stay with me though. Although my w is in a different place in her mind than me, she is still a wonderful mother.I don't know if she really heard me a couple of weeks ago when I said that, but I believe this with all my heart and soul. You said some come here to learn and others don't, I am now a Student - waiting to be fed the knowledge that is needed.
Right now I have done everything wrong to fight for my marriage, so I am here to learn from others the correct way to go about this. Like others, I have never been in this situation. I am like a little baby trying to walk, I have fallen every time I have tried to walk and when I fell, I landed really hard on my w. I am finding out that the more I think I am discussing something logical with her, it is always interpreted totally opposite. Whats worse each time I do what I think is right by talking about the r, I keep pushing her backwards. It is time to stop pushing and start using ways to pull her this way. No More r talk.
