W is angrier after my 180's - time + consistency

[2thepoint]

Quick post:

W brought me lunch today. Then we sat down to discuss breaking the news to the boys this afternoon. I told her what I thought we should say (will provide text below) and she agreed.

I asked her how she was feeling and she said sad and nervous. She asked me how I was feeling and I said just sad. She said she was sorry and then came over to me and hugged me and said she was sorry again. I was tempted, but didn't go there (you know... if you are so sorry than why are you doing this...).

I hope and pray that not saying anything will pay dividends down the road. Who knows.

She also said that I should stay an extra day before leaving so that it won't be so hard on the boys. And she said that she was worried about me being alone to which I replied, don't worry about me. Then she said something that I found odd.

She said that if I wanted we could trade weeks at the apartment so I could spend time at home with the boys. Not sure what to make of that.

Anyway, I thought her hugging me was a sign (small as it may be) of some softening of her heart. Time will tell I suppose.

After we finished our conversation, I sent the following email to my W:

Below is what I think we should tell the boys. I hope you agree. I think as their father I should be the one to break the news. If you disagree, please let me know. Also, as we tell the boys, feel free to chime in where you feel the need. I think it is important that we remain as calm and collected as possible.

Mom and I have been married for a long time and we haven't been getting along very well for the past several months. It has been decided that we should live apart so that we can find our footing and figure out our futures.

Starting later this week I (Dad) will be staying with a friend and then later in the month will move into an apartment across the street from X Middle School.

It is important for you boys to know that we both love you very much. None of this is your fault and we will work through this together and as a family. Nothing will change for you in terms of where you live, your school or your friends. You will continue to see both of us regularly and as often as you want. If you want to spend the night at the apartment, you can. There is a swimming pool and pool table and the school across the street has fields and tennis courts to play on.

I (Dad) will continue to be a big part of your life and you can see me and talk to me as much as you want, day or night. I will continue to take you to soccer practices, attend your games, play ball with you. Anything you want.

It is important that you support your mother during this time. You need to be good boys and do as she says.

We both love you very much. And if we had it to do all over again, we would because you kids are such a wonderful part of our lives.

W replied to the email saying "I think that is perfect. Thank You."

Now if you have been following my thread you'll recall that last week W was adamant that when we tell the boys that we should not give them any false hope. I don't think we do that here but it is very different than her posture from last week where she was leaning more towards talking about disclosing D.

So, maybe another sign, or just some rational thinking on her part?

Time will tell!