Alcoholic H wants D part 2.....

[imthemom]

another venting session...
we went to our co parenting session last night. after what I thought was a great weekend for S14 and H, he spent the first 15 minutes of session complaining about how much money it cost him and how he was not going to be able to do that every time he spent with S14 and basically was all negative about it.
It seemed to stem from the fact that we had decided that he would not keep S14 over night since the house is pretty empty and we thought that would upset S. He said several times that there was now going to be child support and alimoni to be paid (alluding to me filing papers) and he just couldnt afford to spend that kind of money. I felt that he was trying to bring up the papers and the fact that I had moved my things out but the C did not take that opportunity to discuss it and I feel like I cant bring those things up because he gets so defensive when i do.
When the subject of telling our son about D was brought up and how we would approach it she suggested when he asks why (which he will, our son is the question master!!) that we tell him that is basically our buisness and that he just needs to know that we both love him. i DO NOT want to tell him about that A but i definately dont thing telling him it is not his buisness is the way to go..I actually dont want to tell him at all and am not argueing the point but not pushing it along either. It doesnt feel like H is in any hurry to tell him either so I am going with that..I guess i feel like there were chances for her to get us talking about what is going on and she avoided it. Our sessions that my emplyee will pay for are up and he agreed to go through his for some more, so he is obviousley agreeable to being there. When she asked him if a divorce is definat he did answer yes...and there was no mention of OW...he is sticking to the story that the reason for the divorce is because he cannot go back to our R the way it was, she again told him that that reason made no sense to her because the R could be changed with some work. He said that he saw no change in me over the last 2 years and could not trust that.
He came by the house after session and picked up the dreaded bed...which i helped him load in his truck with a smile on my face. (180!!!!) and then discussed how he will bring trailer over tomorrow so I can get it ready for mine and the boys camping trip this weekend.
On my end, I am slowing down and not feeling so paniced about the situation. Not staying up at night crying and trying to not react on the fly to every thing that is said and done. I guess i just wish I knew if there was still a chance or if i should just resign myself to the D....but i guess everyone here has that same thought. would that be easy???
The thing I need the most direction on now is what i should be doing as far as contact...I feel like I should just go dark after this weekend. I cant really now since he is bringing the trailer today and helping get us settled in the camping spot. and yes I can admit that im useing the camping trip as a point of contact. I realize that and will not be doing that anymore. He offered but I jumped on it, should have just said no thank you but thanks for the offer.
Im learning.....
oh, i did tell him in our session that I hoped he remembered from now on that he is a role model for our son and his actions of late have not been ones that show character or integrity and that our S is watching...not sure if that was smart but needed to get that out.