Hey guys! Just wanted to say thanks for all the support. Coy,Acc, very crzy,& Hop. You have all been a big help. It really helps me get through this knowing that one of you will be there to comment and give feedback. Okay, having said that here’s an update. After feeling like the apology had a positive result I’ve been making a concerted effort to “build” my H up. He is REALLY sensitive to words, more so than I realized when we were together. I am not that way. I really let stuff roll off my shoulders. H harbors it inside. I have said some hurtful things and I think I hurt him…. No, I know I hurt him. Well anyway he calls Fri. and says he wants 2 c the baby sun. We talk and decide he will come sun and see hi while I’m in church. I say that’s fine but I make plans to go out for breakfast after church every week now and would he like me to come back and pick up the baby or leave him with him for the morning. He says come back to get him. I’m disappointed; hoping he would spend more time with him other than an hour. However, I keep upbeat and say no prob. I follow up with text a little later saying I was really happy he was coming over to see S and that he is a good dad. (Trying to build him up; let him know that I don’t think he’s a dead beat/ whatever. His mom has been giving him a hard time about not helping) He responds w/ thanks. (Positive communication # 2) Sunday comes and I make sure I look really pretty. I have a new dress and heels that are really flattering that he has never seen before. He comes about 30-45 min early. Feeds baby breakfast. We exchange niceties when I return I mess around with the baby a little and he’s cracking up. We all start laughing and everyone seems happy. As he is leaving I thank him for coming over and “watching” the baby while I was at church. He looks happy w/ himself and stands up tall as he walks out the door and says yep. Then we say see ya later to each other. It is only after I leave that I notice that he has taken something. I have a jewelry box that has an attached picture frame on it. There was a pic in it of us at the lake together from a while ago. He took it out of the frame and took it. I don’t know what he did with it but its gone. I looked in the trash but couldn’t find it anywhere. Not sure what that means. Weird though. What do you guys think? (Positive comm. # 3) Later that day he texts me saying Try and get his sisters things together that she loaned us for the baby so he can get them back to her. (He called first b4 texting, which is kinda different, but I didn’t answer) I sent him a message back saying No prob. I will take care of it. I felt that it was an improvement that he said try instead of do or something like that bc he can be a huge bully sometimes. /about an hour later hid dad calls me from a blocked number and I answer it not realizing it was him. (he is very nasty and is bipolar. He self medicates with booze and pills) He traps me on the phone for a while b4 I end the call. Before I would have called H to tell him about it but didn’t this time. H calls hours later and asks if his Dad called me. I said yes. He wanted to know what he wanted and I said nothing really. He pressed the issue and I said it was just the same old thing that he was being nasty. H said that his dad called his work and he was pissed at him. He also said for me to answer his calls, which I told him about the blocked number but I would be sure to screen more carefully. Then he said that he didn’t tell his dad to do that and to disregard anything he might have said bc it want true or something like that and he didn’t want him stirring anything up. It felt like he was sort of being protective of my feelings. And that we were on the same side sort of. I said ok. and got off the phone. After I thought about it and spoke to my gf, she told me that mybe that was h’s way of reaching out a bit and encouraged me to send a follow up text to “build him”So I sent him, Hey I know you r not the kind of guy 2 call and have your dad say stuff. Don’t sweat it. It was no bid deal and im just ignoring it like u said. It was really decent of u 2 call though thanks for that. I will get your sis stuff ready for you on tues. H replied Sure, I told you b4 we need to get along for the next 18 cause our s, so no need not to start now.. That is the first time since everything that he said we could get along. When I asked him a while ago why he was leaving he said it was bc we couldn’t ever get along. So I guess that’s moving in the right direction. I sent him back lol agreed. Have a nice night at work and he said ok. Any thoughts? Advice? Where do I go from here? Acc I’m going to do a phone convo soon. sorry this is soo long
