David - my best advice is to stop the pursuit! You are driving her further away and don't even realize it. By asking to be friends and then expecting to engage in ways that friends typically engage is only going to create opportunities for you to continue your pursuit.
You have to stop, now!
Your W dropped the bomb just 3 short months ago and already her A is over. Yet, you feel like you can just step back in and everything will be back to normal.
My guess is that your W is now feeling pretty crappy about the demise of her R with you and the OP. 2 strikes! Don't make it 3!
Step back from the brink, continue to work on your 180's and detach as much as possible.
If I were you I would not initiate any contact with your W unless it is a dire emergency. Go dark or light grey and steer clear for awhile.
Events will continue to unfold and things will be clearer in time. But time is what is needed. Especially for your W.
Hang in there, but stop the pursuit.
Me51 W53 S17 S14 M22 T25 Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11
It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.
Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife
