Confronted spouse...now he wont come home

[keep_going]

Nbolst

I am in a similar situation as you - H is in an affair with OW who lives out of town, except that my H left almost a year ago...

OW is actually a client and they go to work conventions together or when she comes to town for work. I confronted him months ago and since then, he has not really hidden any trips he does to visit her. We have 3 kids under the age of 4, so we are in constant communication.

My situation is more desperate than yours in that my H has admitted being in love with OW, wants a D and to start fresh with her. In your case, you and your H are taking some baby steps in renewing your R and strengthening your intimacy.

I would love to have any indication from my H that he is even attracted to me, but all he wants is to be friends, so he won't even let me hug him at times.

So hang in there... definitely concentrate on yourself. I have noticed I am more at peace when I focus on GAL. And everything that 25 has said is such good advice. Re-read Michelle's books and come to the forums often. I find myself always feeling better after I do.

I am also going to counseling - used a DB coach that was great and now through an anger management therapist.

I am not as strong as I thought - I go through a lot of backsliding, but I am NOT giving up, even when it really seems like my M is over. I will continue trying until I have to sign those D papers. He can file if he wants. In the meantime, I am getting up and trying again to be better - for me and for my kids - one day at a time.

So hang in there and continue dbing. You can do this!