I truely believe W is conflicted and probaby extremely guilt ridden as she should be but does she think I won't forgive her? Can she forgive herself?
I may repeat myself here, b/c I have read this same statement from other LBH's many times. Yes, I'm sure your WAW is feeling all sorts of conflicted emotions. But here's the truth about her thoughts on anyone forgiving her: It does not stop her from proceeding with her goal of pushing her H & M out, and continuing with her A/OM and how it is for the best. (Mostly, her "best") These feelings push out any rational thinking on her part. The LBH needs to stop expecting or wondering about that.
Does she think you won't forgive her. Can she forgive herself. Again, this is a question only the LBH seems to be concerned with during the time she's gunho in pushing him out. She's not thinking about forgiveness from you or herself......not now. Can you realize that? I think, based on my own experience, it is part of the messed up chemical induced fog that effects anything rational. You forgiving her.....is not her concern. I didn't care if my H forgave me or not, when I was in an EA. And she's not thinking about forgiving herself b/c she thinks this her last chance at true happiness and she would not forgive herself if she didn't pursue it. Why would she forgive herself when she believes she's doing the right thing?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
