W is angrier after my 180's - time + consistency

[2thepoint]

Ugh! What a disaster! So says my SIL in a text yesterday when she asked how I was doing. "Getting things in order as I prepare to tell the kids and then move out."

I've arranged for a temporary place to stay till the apt is ready.

We will probably tell the kids tonight or tomorrow just in time for W's 49th b-day. Surprise! As a gift to herself, Mom has decided to walk away from her 21 year relationship with your father. Now let's blow out the candles and eat some cake, shall we?

Confirmed more of the EA/A today. Quite by accident but now with some pics/vid evidence, there is NO DOUBT!

I truely believe W is conflicted and probaby extremely guilt ridden as she should be but does she think I won't forgive her? Can she forgive herself?

As suggested I will be seeking the counsel of a L next week. Not because I intend to beat W to the punch and file, but because I need to understand rights and responsibilities.

I intend to continue my DB efforts but also want to make the path home paved and smooth. As I tell people about our separation (theres no getting around this) I will be careful to not share intimate details so as to keep the path clear.

But how do I signal top my W that she can come back, that it is not too late, that there is hope for us?

God, what a mess!