Okay, time to give up on having any kind of emotional intimacy with this man. I've had enough. I'm moving on. I am going to encourage him to go to counseling with me so he won't give me a hard time, like he has done about me getting involved with another man.
I'm going to need some serious therapy and probably anti-anxiety drugs and I am sure the only way to get over hoping to get back with him is when I have connected with someone else who meets my needs.
we have a good friendship and co-parenting relationship and I will maintain that and just get my intimacy needs met elsewhere.
I did have figured out how if he had intimacy issues, why were we really so intimate at first and if he has commitment issues, how can he have been so committed to me and our child???
The answer is that he can't do both at the same time. And if I can only have one or the other, I'd rather have the commitment from him.
I really think we could have worked something out if he wanted to, but he doesn't seem to even want to want to.He just wants to maintain the status quo.
I try not to be, but I am angry at him for not putting some effort into helping us to have a mutually satisfying relationship. But I'm going to be putting enormous effort into breaking out of this and building a healthy relationship at someone else.
I am trying to expect that all things are going to work out for the best.
Susan Page's book, "If I'm So Wonderful, Why am I Still Single" is great.
I also am remembering that this shouldn't be as traumatic as a divorce situation since we have never lived together or been legally entangled beyond child custody and support issues. That will not change.
I have asked him to keep her one more overnight a week (I usually get her at 8:00 on Tuesdays after she has been in preschool and he picks her up after work till after supper). This will give me Tuesday Night and Friday night to work on meeting and dating, or just GAL.
