Antonia, I cried when I read your post of your sweet farewell to your loyal cat and of your exchange with your xh.
I truly believe that if things happen for a reason and if we listen real closely, we find out why.
I have no doubt that your beloved kitty held on for you. Animals are amazing and intuitive.
I know the story of a cat that lives in a nursing home. When someone is near death, the cat lovingly stays by the side of that person, often at the foot of the bed. He knows often before the nurses realize. The people who live there do not fear when he comes towards them. They feel at peace. They know that they will not be alone when there time comes. Amazing, isnt it?
Sweetie, you are an extraordinary woman. One with such love in her heart and such strength and insight and courage.
Please remember that whatever you did or didnt do during this crisis with your xh was never with the intention to hurt him. I know without a single doubt that you did your very best with the tools and knowledge you had at the time.
I do hope that when you have digested what you both said and feelings it must surely have brought up have been dealt with, that you really and truly forgive yourself.
Your xh really has suffered a tremendous loss when he decided to sacrifice you for him. he may not realize it fully now, but one day he well. No matter.
Antonia, balance is key in life. No one person or thing should take up too much space.
So, now you have learned some more. The very best way to honor your little boy is to heed what he's taught you.
We only get this one chance. Savor and enjoy as much of life as you can.
Congrats on being contacted by your subject. How exciting!
Safely tuck your lovely memories of your baby and your marriage in your hear and then live your life, A. Live it well.
