What do I do next?

[luvhurts49]

I know I still need to learn how to detach more and I really need to stay on track with DBing and GAL, but it's hard sometimes because I get depressed when I don't have my kids and I start to think about my W. Lack of money and only a small number of friends also doesn't help when it comes to GAL either.

Having that hope that my W will come back is probably becoming a hindrance more than it is helping me cope at this point, but I still can't let go of that hope. Maybe I keep that hope more for my kids than myself, I don't know, but I know that my oldest sees that hope in me and it makes him happy that I'm not giving up although he sees his mom giving up on our M. Maybe I'm just scared that by losing that hope, I will lose any thoughts of her and I would be losing that hope for my kids too.