Thank you for the kind words BklynMom. I think it's weird that we can go so long without talking then all of a sudden we talk and see each other every day. I do agree that she is feeling safer with me. Honestly, I think that I feel more secure and confident in myself than what she does with herself. I believe she is seeing some changes, but isn't quite sure yet. There's a part of me that is getting the sense that she is maybe, kinda, sorta, possibly entertaining the idea that on some very, very small level she could have microscopic remnants of an idea than she may have some feelings for me still. Then again, she's done some things that I never thought she would do...so who knows.
Personally, I'm not ready to jump back into the relationship. I would love to be back together again, but I have too many things that I would like to continue working on for myself. IF we ever thought of getting back together again I would like to start by committing to each other not to date and continue to work on ourselves. We don't have to talk everyday, just take it a day at a time. When we're ready to move on to the next level, we'll both know and we'll move there. I want to re-date her and woo her all over again. I don't want the same depressing marriage we had before. I want a new one. I want to get to know her all over again.
That may be the furthest thing from her mind right now. It needs to be the furthest thing from my mind too. It's hard not to get antsy and hopeful right now...I've read too many posts to fool myself thinking that this could possibly be something. I've got to focus harder on me...if not, I could be setting myself up for some more pain and delay any chances of reconciliation.
