ROMB, Wow! He is working really hard to vilify you! That might not be a bad thing that he has to work that hard to vilify you. There's a possibility that means he's struggling and confused. If only he'd work that hard on the M, huh? You are doing a great job of responding to him. Keep up the good work with that. I know it's not easy. Come here and vent or vent elsewhere.
Originally Posted By: realormakebeliev
He says its not that he doesn't want to, he just can't keep doing that- that he's afraid it will give me false hope, and that he thinks I feel like it will make everything better.
I'm sorry, ROMB. ((())) I think what WHG said was on the money - he is telling himeslf that as much or more than he is telling you that. That he is telling you he's afraid it will give you false hope may be saying he has a glimmer of hope he's trying to squash in his own mind.
It's hard when you drop back into the relational conversations to keep your DB'ing hat on all the time. I think we all backslide a bit sometimes or tip our playbook so to speak. You were just being honest and authentic. TBH, I think you did reasonably well. From what you were vague on whether the changes were for you or him. IOW, you didn't make it sound like you were changing just to win him back.
